Refocusing

The objective is somehow intangible though. It's like that little blind spot that hides the stars when you look directly at them. Have thought of a few things though. Let cynicism and bitterness go to where they rightly belong now before I end up on the street corner yelling "What the hell happened?!". Being true to yourself...but who am I, what am I? What was I? What have I become? More confused. No one wants to hear that rubbish, everyone has their own inner quandries. So why voice it? Maybe it's the hope that one person will hear, just one, and help me refocus myself. There has to be a better tomorrow and a better way to get there. Hard to care most days. Time to feed off of being a better version of myself, back to the way things once were. I liked who I was once upon a time. To find the way back, surely it is possible.

Maybe I Should Have Taken the Road More Traveled

I don't know. Not a clue. Where the heck am I going for the next decade of my life? I really don't know. Twenty through twenty-nine were open for suggestions, but I ended up with exactly what I wanted. Now...er...well, my vision is blurred. New career? New locale? Some goal to shoot for would be good. It's like I have all the time in the world, but it's running out too fast. What do I want to do with it? How to be just happy again? Maybe this is not the best of times in the greater scheme of things to start desiring change. Poor economy (do we ever tire of hearing about it? every day!), a three year old kiddo grinning at me as I write this, and a job that some days is in question whether it will be there tomorrow. Move to the forest and live off the land again. At least that gives peace to the soul. Living in town is awful, just awful. There is no escape from the boredom within it. It's overwhelming. So where to go, what to do for the next ten years? Maybe I'll work on that while going back to the daily grind. Maybe the road more traveled would have worked out better than the non-conformist, off-beat one I've taken. Hind-sight maybe 20/20, but the future is blurry.